Remember
by Dylixia
Summary: Sometimes being love makes you feel alive when the world is dead. Other times, it makes you want to die. It's up to Axel to prove to Roxas that this pain is love and that only by finding hearts through each other can they be relieved of this agony. A/R


**Remember-**

_**Aku**__**Roku **__**oneshot, **__**for Elena's birthday – **__**H**__**a**__**p**__**p**__**y**____**B**__**i**__**r**__**t**__**h**__**d**__**a**__**y**__**, **__**Tobi**__**!**_

"C'mon, Roxas!" Olette called to me, breaking my momentary trance. She smiled warmly at me when I finally turned to face her. She held her hand out to me, offering to help me up.

"Nah, thanks. I think I'm going to stay up here for a while." I replied, shaking my head.

My friend let out a jokey sigh, but I could sense the serious undertone to her playful gesture.  
Lately, I felt like I was incomplete, like my heart just wasn't in anything anymore. I couldn't be sure of whether or not this phase was normal... I just knew that it was really bugging my friends. They couldn't help it, of course... what are you supposed to do when one of your friends keeps spacing out, and stops being social? I frowned, running a hand through the spiky blonde mess that was my hair. Olette noticed this habitual sign of frustration, and gently laid a delicate hand on my shoulder.

"Are you okay?" She asked, squeezing my shoulder lightly, comfortingly. "You can still come with us, you know." Her tone was worried, which immediately flooded me with guilt. It was unfair that I was making my friends worry...

"I just feel like watching the sunset tonight." I lied. That wasn't the real reason I wanted to stay back. I was being suffocated by a heavy feeling of numb. I was growing more and more antisocial. I just needed to be alone. "Go on ahead."

Olette isn't stupid. She removed her hand from my shoulder, and tucked a strand of brown hair behind her ear. Her emerald eyes shone with worry, still, but she managed to force a kind smile before turning back to Hayner and Pence, who were heading over to the stairway that lead down from the clock tower, that I was currently sitting on the ledge of.

"Well, if you're sure..." She trailed off, still not convinced. She knew I had purposefully avoided the 'Are you okay?' question, and she didn't know what to say next.

"Of course I am!" I insisted, forcing what must have been a pitiful attempt at a smile. "Go on ahead- I'll see you guys tomorrow anyways, right?"

"You're right. Well, we'll be at the usual spot if you change your mind. See you, Roxas." She threw a wistful look in my direction, before jogging over to join Hayner and Pence. My other friends looked disappointed when Olette told them I was staying behind, but neither of them looked at all surprised.  
I fought back against the persistent wave of guilt that was trying to drown me.

They disappeared down the stairway, chatting animatedly, and I stayed where I was, sitting on the ledge of the tall clock tower, feeling more alone than ever... yet not actually minding.  
The chattering of my friends faded away as they continued their way down the staircase.  
A minute or so later, I saw them, as tiny dots, making their way through the alleyways, over to our usual spot, where they disappeared from my sight.

The sun was setting over Twilight Town- painting the sky in wonderful pastel colours. Oranges, blues, pinks and purples, streaked across the landscape, bringing beauty to the place where I had lived for as long as I could remember.

Something about the picturesque sunset touched me inside, made something snap- something unknown but welcome. Déjà vu flashed within me, but it wasn't followed by the spark of recognition.  
What was I remembering? I had sat up here, and watched the same scene, with someone important. I let out a strangled cry of frustration when my mind refused to let the memories resurface.  
This was why nothing made sense anymore. A part of me was blocking my conscious from discovering who I really am- I just knew it! I could feel the invisible wall, blocking me off from realization.  
Although, when I was up on the clock tower, the first chip was made in the wall. Bit by bit, I knew the wall would crumble. It was all starting now.

My chest started to tingle, all of a sudden... right over my heart. Throwing a hand against my chest, I gripped my shirt tightly as the tingle ascended into a sharp shooting pain. Nausea tumbled over me, and my skin felt like it was being pierced by millions of sharp ice needles. I think I literally felt the colour drain away from my face. What the hell was going on?! The harsh sensation came so close to absolute agony, yet it never really pushed over that line. I let out a hiss of confusion, head snapping from side to side as I desperately searched for an explanation to this surge of pain. Nothing gave it away though- the town below me was still peaceful, there was not a single thing out of place. However, that didn't change that something looked wrong about the scene.  
All sound had stopped. My hair had stopped rustling in the gentle wind- because there wasn't one. Eyes widening, I tilted my head upwards, the pain in my chest briefly forgotten. The birds in the air had stopped mid-flight, their wings frozen. They didn't fall; they hung suspended amongst the sunset.

"It's okay, Roxas." A deep voice sounded from right beside me, snapping me from my shock, but scaring me further.

I scrambled to get to my feet, whilst trying not to topple over the edge of the clock tower, and crash to a painful death. When I finally regained my footing, I turned to face the man who had addressed me.  
He was at least a foot taller than me- which did nothing to calm my nerves. He looked like he was very muscular and toned beneath that black cloak- meaning he could seriously hurt me if he wanted to. Studying his face, I distantly noted that his emerald eyes held a sad emotion within them, and his pink lips were tugged up slightly at the corners, in a sad smile. These factors should have calmed me down; he didn't look like he wanted to fight... but the powerful adrenaline surging through my veins did not allow me to think logically or clearly.

"Who the hell are _you_?" I hissed, switching to a defensive pose. This guy must have literally appeared out of nowhere- I hadn't heard him approach me. Then again, I _was_ freaking out due to a sensation similar to a heart attack.

My question made the man before me flinch. He reached a hand up to run it through his outrageously spiky red hair. It was amazingly bright, and it stood out against his porcelain skin. Two triangular black 

shapes were tattooed underneath his eyes, one on each side. From a distance, because of the sad expression on his face upon seeing me, they looked like inky black tear drops.

"You really _don't_ remember." He looked so heartbroken when he said this, in his deep, alluring voice; it just tugged on my heartstrings so strongly. My anger actually subsided a little.

"I-I don't have a clue who you are, but you've gotta be responsible for this whole thing!" I growled, thanking the gods that my voice didn't falter more than once during that accusation.

The guy was gazing at me with such intensity... and it was dragging forth a long-forgotten memory. I felt like I... _knew_ him. But I had never seen him before in my life. He obviously knew me. Had I really forgotten someone so unique-looking? No, that was impossible. After just a few moments of meeting him, I knew his image was imprinted into my mind, every perfect little detail etched into my memory.

"Well, of course. I needed to see you." The redhead stated, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. I frowned, urging my heart to stop its persistent attempts to rip its way out of my chest.

My hand automatically came up to clutch the material of my shirt, right above my heart.  
Even though my eyes were squeezed shut in pain, I could feel the jade eyes of this stranger on me. Forcing my eyes to open, I willed the pain away.

"My name is Axel." _Axel._

Axel.

The name made something inside of me snap.

"You're my best friend."

_Yes._ It sounds right.

But it can't be! I don't even know him!

_But you do_. My heart argued.

"I don't know you!" I exclaimed, gesticulating wildly.

Axel nodded, in defeat. I felt terrible. Something was nagging at the edge of my mind, but it wouldn't come forth and show itself. Suddenly, a black portal type door opened appeared right behind Axel, and somehow I knew that he had summoned it. He sent me one last, lingering gaze, before turning around and taking a step towards the swirling door to darkness.

"No!" A cry of protest escaped my lips before I could even think about it. I don't know why, but this guy couldn't leave just yet. I just wasn't... I wasn't ready for that. "Stay."

He turned his head towards me, without actually turning his body to face me. A hint of a sad smile was tugging at the corners of his lips.

"But you don't remember." He murmured, and I felt so frozen at that moment, that I'm sure I must have looked as though I were carved out of ice.

"I can! I don't just yet... but, I know that I can!" I insisted, acting out of pure impulse. The logical part of my mind was asking me why I was being so needy towards this stranger. But my heart... my heart was telling me that Axel was no stranger.

Everything that happened next happened so quickly. One moment, Axel was walking towards me, hands clenching and unclenching by his sides, as if he were debating his choice of staying. The next moment, a whoosh of air, and a blur of black and red later, Axel was behind me, with his arm draped over my shoulder. His toned chest was pushed flush into my back, and his warm breath was tickling my ear. My chest tightened instantly, causing me to tense up.  
My initial reaction was to move away- what was he doing? He said he was my best friend... but best friends didn't do that kind of thing, did they? Where was his respect for my personal space?  
He was so _warm_ though... the physical contact sent a shiver through me, but a pleasurable shiver. Like the kind you get from sitting next to a roaring fire, after returning from a day in cold snow.  
Before I could decide what to do, Axel spoke again.

"I'll help you, then." He whispered, huskily. It felt like those words actually brushed something inside of me, tickling my soul.

He brought up a hand, clad in soft black velvet, up to caress my neck softly. It tickled, but I didn't move, except for a slight shiver and a tilt of my neck to allow more of the affectionate gesture.  
It wasn't until a pair of soft lips pressed themselves into my neck, that I realised I had granted Axel more space to do as he pleased. I gasped, which caused the lips against my neck to pull up slightly in a smirk- I felt it. Then, the warm lips parted slightly, and Axel sucked slightly, drawing the blood to the surface of my skin- which I could feel was quickly going tomato-red as the blush that was staining my face gradually spread as my embarrassment increased.

"Ngh... what're you doing?" I breathed out, trying to protest.

"Let me help you _remember_." A tongue slipped out to lick at the abused skin of my neck, punctuating the offer, whilst heightening the temptation. Although the tone was laced with what I could only assume was lust, the need, the desperation for recognition within _me_, was painfully obvious.

Axel's other hand took a firm grip on my shoulder, and spun me around so I was facing him. My face was flushed, and I couldn't bring myself to look at him. I kept my eyes trained on the floor, desperately trying to will the blush away.

"Look at me." I didn't comply with the command. "Look at me, damnit! I want to see your eyes!"

I still didn't look up; the emotions swirling in my stomach were making me feel sick. They were so powerful- but unidentifiable. I didn't know what they were, but they were causing me to feel weak and 

helpless. I didn't want to be in this situation- yet I think it would kill me if I were to leave. Everything about this guy was so wrong, but so right at the same time.

When I refused to make eye contact, a pale hand reached out and cupped my chin. Tilting my head upwards, my eyes were forced to meet with jade orbs, glittering with despondency- or maybe those were tears. I must have looked horrified. But how was I supposed to look? I was on the verge of having a mental breakdown.

Before I could comprehend what was happening, Axel had leaned forward, pressing his lips to my own, hard. He moved his lips against my own, applying more pressure, asking- _begging_- for compliance from me. I was too shocked to do anything. His lips were so warm, and they felt so nice against my own.  
I didn't know what it would mean if I kissed back... I didn't know what it would do to me.

Axel apparently was unaware of my internal debate. My eyes slipped closed when a wet tongue swiped at my bottom lip, silently requesting entrance. When I took too long to reply, Axel's tongue pried my lips apart, and slipped inside. My eyes shot open in shock, revealing the emerald eyes of my forgotten best friend. He was watching my face intently, pleadingly. Realising that this meant so much to him, I let my eyes drop closed again, giving in to the pleasant feeling of the emotional kiss.

His tongue ran over every inch of my mouth, over every tooth, massaging my tongue with his own. With one hand cupping my face softly, and the other resting on my shoulder, the taller male managed to make me feel so connected to him. Pulling back from the kiss, he leant his forehead against mine, and stared deeply into my eyes.

"Do you remember?" He breathed, against my lips.

I squeezed my eyes shut, tears forming, and threatening to spill if I kept my eyes open. Oh, how desperately I wanted to remember. I _needed _to remember. What had happened to me? Was I really not who I thought I was! _Why?!_

His sharp teeth took my bottom lip between them, and bit down gently, worrying the delicate skin, but not actually puncturing it. Releasing it, he licked it gently.

"Well, do you?" He repeated, moving down to kiss my neck.

I couldn't answer. My chest and throat had become so tight, knowing that I was about to break my best friend, just by not being able to remember.

And he was my best friend. He was.

I could feel it. Somewhere inside of me, I remembered that Axel was my most important person. The light in the dark.

I knew this, because after God knows how long, of numbness and emptiness, Axel had shown up... when 

I needed someone most, and in the space of just a few minutes, he dragged forward so many feelings. I felt more alive than ever, from the moment he touched me.

I opened my eyes, meeting his gaze. The tears that had welled up ceremoniously trickled down my cheeks. Axel watched, still panting slightly from the intense kiss. His green eyes followed the salty drops as they streamed silently from my eyes.

"Oh God," He pulled back from me, head drooping. He shook it from side to side, miserably. "I don't understand. She said you'd remember."

I didn't know who 'she' was, but I didn't really care. All I cared about in that moment in time, was that I had hurt Axel. He was in agony- I could see that, just by at looking at him. Tears were filling his eyes, and violently spilling over as he tried to hold in him emotions.

"Why can't you remember _us_? Why can't you _feel_ it?!" He'd stepped closer to me, grabbing me by the forearms, and shaking me violently- but not hard enough to hurt.

I let my head loll backwards with the rough movements, the tears still pouring from my eyes.

"I feel it." I whispered.

Axel's hard shaking stopped, and his hands slowly ran down my arms when he released me.  
Stepping closer to me, a twinkle of happiness became visible in his eyes. I was physically shaking by this point, my arms hanging loosely at my sides, but trembling. When he reached me, he enveloped me in a tight hug. He placed his lips next to my ear, and breathed out a sigh of contentment.

"You really feel it?" His warm breath was tickling my ear, but I didn't mind, I just leant further into the embrace.

"Yeah, I really do." I was breathing so heavily, and it felt like I was admitting to saving the world, instead of just confessing my feelings. Whoever I used to be- part of him was still there. I was in love with Axel before, and I was in love with him now. I guess even forgotten memories cannot change love.

I could feel it, in my blood, coursing around my body, hot and fiery. At least one feeling was identifiable.  
It was speeding through my body so fast, I actually felt dizzy, as if I were about to topple over and faint any second. Luckily, Axel was pressing his body into mine with such urgency; there was no chance of that happening. Bringing his head back around to face me, he smiled warmly, before our lips connected once more, in a heated and intense kiss.

"I knew I could help you remember." He murmured against my lips. "At least I could help you remember this much."

"I'm glad you did." I replied, not being able to find the right words to express my pure contentment.

Axel had helped me to find my old self. Gone, were the feelings of numb, replaced by absolute love.  
Somehow, I knew it had to end.

The warm hug ended, and Axel pulled away. With a click of his fingers, all sound and movement rushed back to the world around me. The birds carried on flying, their wings flapping, merrily continuing their journey. Tearing my eyes away from Axel's small smile, I glanced back down at my hometown. Indeed, the people in the streets were moving once more- and their chattering could be heard from where we stood on the clock tower- me, with no memories or feelings, except love, for my once forgotten best friend who stood opposite me.

"I have to go now."

My heart sank in my chest. I nodded, slowly, not wanting this feeling to end. My biggest fear was that as soon as Axel disappeared from my life again, I wouldn't be able to find this feeling ever again. Would I even ever find _Axel_ again? Previously unnoticed, fresh tears started to pour from my eyes. They dripped onto the floor, the sound hardly audible above the chatter of the townspeople. How cruel, that my internal pain is so unimportant in this world, that it couldn't even be heard. That's how insignificant my feelings were to the harsh clutches of fate.

"Don't worry. We'll meet again, Roxas." Axel had moved to stand in front of me again, without me even noticing. He pulled me flush against him, my hand resting against his chest, and his cupping my face once more.

With his thumb, he brushed the tears away from my cheeks, even though he too, was crying.  
Tilting his head downwards, he kissed me again. The kiss was more urgent than the others, but no less intense. I could feel his soul being poured into this one- it slipped through my own lips, and connected with my own. There, our souls swirled and danced together, filling us both. They brush and meld together, and when our lips and tongues disconnect, our souls slip out again. But this time, they're bonded together- inseparable.

Our lips meet again, not once, not twice, but a total of three times- neither of us wanting to give up the feelings that the small touches sent through us. It was like each press of our lips sent sparks flying between us, re-igniting the previously forgotten fire.

"I love you."

"I love you too. I can feel it."

A small chuckle escapes from Axel's lips, as he releases me from his embrace. My body instantly craves the contact again.

"They always told me that nobodies weren't able to feel anything. But you've given me emotions- you've given me a heart. No- you _are_ my heart."

His words confused me, but at the same time, they made perfect sense. I had been feeling empty, before he came. Like my heart was missing. But now, it was warm in my chest, sending this new feeling through my veins, making me tingle all over.

"See ya, Partner."

"Goodbye, Axel."

And then he was gone.

And I didn't feel alone. I made my way back down to the usual spot. I smiled at all my friends, and we laughed together. They were as shocked with the change as I was, but they didn't question me directly.

"So you're okay now?" Hayner asked, between chuckles at a funny joke I'd just cracked.

"Yeah." I grinned, happily, playing with the wristband on my left wrist. "I've got my heart back."

**Happy Birthday, Elena! **

**I hope you liked it. It sucks- but I tried! :sweatdrop:  
My main goal was to get it really emotional- but I'm not sure if I achieved that. Also, I'm so sorry if they're out of character to you- it's hard writing emotional things whilst keeping the people in-character.  
I really hope you liked it.  
Connie **


End file.
